Don't read if you can't handle the topic of shit (although you will laugh!)
I should be working on my Dad's powerpoint presentation, but I've just got to get this down. We are in the process of potty training Austin. At his 3-yr check-up the doc said to take him out of his pull-up diapers and put him in underwear b/c he had the vocab to speak up and that those pull-up diapers are just too absorbent to want him to make a change. We've been doing awesome with peeing, but the boy refuses to poop on the pot. I think it's b/c he's gotten so accustomed to pooping in the standing position. He'd go and hide behind a chair and that would be that.
Well, the first time he pooped in regular underwear I was home and was semi-freaking, saying, "Austin, come into the bathroom. Mommy has to deal with this. How don't know HOW Mommy is going to handle this... Dear God, what do I do?" kind of talk... but it wasn't bad (now a messy poop, thank God).
Yesterday ON OUR WAY OUT THE DOOR TO SCHOOL the "Mommy, I have poop" sentence came out of his mouth. (could he not have waited a little longer so the teachers could deal with this???). We had to do a quick clean-up, change and then we were at school 15 min late. Well, that day I worked my ass off which meant no time to break for lunch. When I left to get the kids I was shaky-hungry (hate that feeling), so we stopped at the McDonald's drive thru on our way to the gym (great idea, I know). I got my kid's meal and Austin got his. Then we cruised over to the new L.A. Fitness to check it out and pick up my new ID card (Jeff had added me to his plan over the phone that morning).
I walked into the gym with big baby Jack on my hip and Austin at my heels. I just wanted to get it over with. Some 18yr old blonde beauty gave us the tour which started at the kid's area. Austin loved it and played while I asked spycho parent questions like, "do the staff personnel watching the kids know CPR?" I managed to coax Austin out of the play area so we could continue our tour of the facility and I noticed Austin was walking like he'd been riding a hours for a day. ("Shit! I thought, not here, not now of all places!). So I asked him, "Austin, did you go poop?" The poor blonde, who looked like she hadn't babysat a day in her life, seemed in awe of my situation. Austin politely answered, "nnnoooo..." and I decided that he was just being shy around all the buff big guys on the machines we were walking around. The rest of the tour was ok, lasted about 15 min, and we were out of there in 20. My arms were about to fall off from holding Jack the whole time and I was so excited to be leaving. Austin offered to "be a gentelement" and hold the door open for me as we were leaving. Yes, I'm teaching him manly manners already.
The second we were outside he admitted to having pooped in his pants. I immediately racked my brain for the next steps: where to clean him up? I'm parked smack dab in front of the place and everyone inside can see my car. How to clean him? I took the diaper wipes out of Jack's diaper bag b/c they are heavy and the school already has wipes. What to change him into? We'd already used his spare change of underwear that morning. 5 seconds later (yes, all those thoughts transpired in 5 seconds) I started towards the card with both boys...all the while asking Austin why he didn't tell me he had to poop.
FIRST: I settled Jack into his car seat and I left his door open, allowing Austin to be shielded for privacy between Jack's door and my door. SECOND: I got him out of his shorts to assess the damage done. It was worse than I'd thought; we had leakage down the leg. THIRD: After insisting in a crazy voice that Austin stand completely still, I scanned the car for any unused napkins from our prior trip to McDonald's.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Birthday Blogging
So, this year was my first year to be the mother of 2 boys and 2 celebrations to plan. I wanted Jack's first to be as special as Austin's, so we did a birthday dinner the night of the 28th (a thurs) and we invited our friends to the event. That had me cleaning the house, buying party decor and dinner ingredients after work on Tues. I did more cleaning and all the cooking, and I had to include food for a vegetarian. I did the Arroz con Pollo that I like to make, along with fresh black beans and we had queso for snacks. It was a LOT of work, and more of me running around like a mad woman, but it was worth it. My favorite memories of that night are a) Jack getting his first taste of cake (champagne cake - and did I mention that I baked a damn cherry pie, too?!), b) all of us singing Happy Birthday to him, and c) breaking out the musical toys he and Austin got as gifts and having an impromptu jam session with Ellie, Doug, Carl, Anne and the boys.
His second FIRST birthday party was on the following Saturday at Splash. Yes, I made all the damn sandwiches and it was hot. He made a complete mess out of his smash cake and his adorable cupcake fish cake didn't get a good pic taken of it before it was all melting and messy. I think he had a good time, and I know Austin and the other kids liked it. We came home to disaster zone full of crap everywhere and toys/clothes/gifts all over the place. But there it was: done and done. Jack's first milestone had come and gone and I quickly became the mother of TWO TODDLER BOYS!!!
For about 3 months Austin was saying that he wanted a Mickey Mouse birthday party every time we asked him about it. This would have been his second in a row, but I knew I could do it up kinda cool. I was just worried about finding a PLACE to have the party. I was convinced it would be another swimming party b/c for summer b-days, that's about all you have as an option. Well, the boy amazed me! Out of nowhere he said, "I wanna have a Big Blue Bowling Birthday Party!" Genius! Loved it! Air Conditioning!!! I quickly made a party reservation at the Main Event in Grapevine, and then I hand crafted some invites, adding a request that all the kids come wearing Austin's favorite color: blue (cute idea, I know). So, it seemed all was taken care of except party favors and a cake. I had no idea what to do for the cake. I didn't want a bowling cake, and I didn't want a "3rd Birthday" cake... I wanted something unique and special for him. I couldn't think of anything so I finally threw my hands up in the air and asked Austin what kind of cake he wanted. Genius answer #2! "Mommy, I want a shark cake and I want to eat the Mean Shark!" (Hey, and sharks swim in blue water, don't they?!). So there I was, scouring the internet for shark cake ideas and I kid you not, I was going to attempt to bake my own 3-D-shark-coming-out-of-the-water-showing-teeth-and-all cake. But after much begging and pleading from Jeff, I gave up the idea and our lovely bakery down the street fit us in as a last-minute order. They had a great shark cake pic that I chose and that was that... except for party favors.
2 nights before his party, I saw a mailer for Michael's advertising blanks Ts on sale. I decided to make shirts for all the kids. I downloaded more coupons and spent all day Friday buying shirts (even had to venture out to the outlet mall for baby t's) and iron-on supplies. Then I designed the logos, one design for girls and one design for boys, and each shirt logo incorporated the child's name, along with "Big Blue Bowling" along the side and Austin's name along with the date on the bowling ball. (The logo consisted of 3 bowling pics getting knocked by a bowling ball and a fiery flame behind them. The logo background for girls had blue circles and the one for boys had little skulls and lightening bolts). I'll have to find a way to show pics. Of course, they were a huge hit but then Kristi made an excellent point: "Melissa, the $5 game cards for the kids are like a favor; you shouldn't have worried about doing more than that!" Huh... she was right. Oh Well! I also had blue hair spray and Mina picked up some blue crystal stick-ons that all the girls wore on their faces. Jeff's hair was blue but he as too shy to show it, so he sported a hat! Anyway, you would have thought that the party would go smoothly, etc. But it was crazy. Austin didn't take a nap AT ALL! that day. I was freaking out about it and Jeff was freaking b/c there was no time for him to get ready. Also, Jack was tired. So we got to the party, everything/everyone was waiting around and unsure. Then when we finally got started bowling, kids were hungry and Austin was completely in borderline MELTDOWN mode. Jeff's BOSS was there with his kids and we were so stressed about Austin having a bad kicking/screaming temper tantrum in front of him that we did any and everything we could think of to keep him happy. This meant he chomped down almost 3 bags of Cheetos from the vending machine. When we got in the party room we had to wait for the pizza and my dad had the kids chanting,"We want pizza!" and he cleverly added, "We want Tacos!" ;-) It seemed like forever but we eventually had the pizza done, we sang Happy Birthday (Austin sang the loudest) and he loved the look of the shark cake (decorated with 3 bowling pin candles and a bowling ball). They all had cake and ice cream and we packed the gifts up to take home. THEN CAME THE ARCADE TIME!!! It took ages for them to use all the $5 cards and I got to hold HEAVY Jack the entire time. Austin almost fell asleep in the truck on the way home but he managed through a third wind and when we got home he opened presents and we all played, the 4 of us, with toys while we watched The Sandlot (which I must add taught my son how to kiss like a man, pitch a baseball and say the word shit!).
On his actual birthday we met up at Grapevine Mills for dinner at the Rainforest Cafe. I thought he'd get a kick out of it and he did. Jack liked it too. They sang him Happy Birthday and he thought he was pretty cool shit. Then we walked the ENTIRE mall looking for baseball stuff! We gave up but on the way home I managed to convince Jeff to stop at Toys R Us on the way home and take him in (Austin had $5 from Memaw and a $3 gift card saved in his wallet for the occasion and I wanted him to get to use it). I'll never forget how adorable he and Jeff looked when they walked out of the store; he had a glove on his hand and he was so excited telling me about all the baseball stuff he got and how he was "going to hit the ball real far!" Poor Jack was so tired he cried, more like yelled, during the drive home. He was probably has relieved as I was when we got home and I realized that BOTH birthdays were officially done and behind us.
The idea is that next year, and probably most non-milestone birthdays, we will just do one kick-ass combo birthday party for the boys. It will be cheaper, that's for sure! And I'll only have to be crazy over one party instead of 4! (Of course, we'll still celebrate each birthday, just us Massies).
His second FIRST birthday party was on the following Saturday at Splash. Yes, I made all the damn sandwiches and it was hot. He made a complete mess out of his smash cake and his adorable cupcake fish cake didn't get a good pic taken of it before it was all melting and messy. I think he had a good time, and I know Austin and the other kids liked it. We came home to disaster zone full of crap everywhere and toys/clothes/gifts all over the place. But there it was: done and done. Jack's first milestone had come and gone and I quickly became the mother of TWO TODDLER BOYS!!!
For about 3 months Austin was saying that he wanted a Mickey Mouse birthday party every time we asked him about it. This would have been his second in a row, but I knew I could do it up kinda cool. I was just worried about finding a PLACE to have the party. I was convinced it would be another swimming party b/c for summer b-days, that's about all you have as an option. Well, the boy amazed me! Out of nowhere he said, "I wanna have a Big Blue Bowling Birthday Party!" Genius! Loved it! Air Conditioning!!! I quickly made a party reservation at the Main Event in Grapevine, and then I hand crafted some invites, adding a request that all the kids come wearing Austin's favorite color: blue (cute idea, I know). So, it seemed all was taken care of except party favors and a cake. I had no idea what to do for the cake. I didn't want a bowling cake, and I didn't want a "3rd Birthday" cake... I wanted something unique and special for him. I couldn't think of anything so I finally threw my hands up in the air and asked Austin what kind of cake he wanted. Genius answer #2! "Mommy, I want a shark cake and I want to eat the Mean Shark!" (Hey, and sharks swim in blue water, don't they?!). So there I was, scouring the internet for shark cake ideas and I kid you not, I was going to attempt to bake my own 3-D-shark-coming-out-of-the-water-showing-teeth-and-all cake. But after much begging and pleading from Jeff, I gave up the idea and our lovely bakery down the street fit us in as a last-minute order. They had a great shark cake pic that I chose and that was that... except for party favors.
2 nights before his party, I saw a mailer for Michael's advertising blanks Ts on sale. I decided to make shirts for all the kids. I downloaded more coupons and spent all day Friday buying shirts (even had to venture out to the outlet mall for baby t's) and iron-on supplies. Then I designed the logos, one design for girls and one design for boys, and each shirt logo incorporated the child's name, along with "Big Blue Bowling" along the side and Austin's name along with the date on the bowling ball. (The logo consisted of 3 bowling pics getting knocked by a bowling ball and a fiery flame behind them. The logo background for girls had blue circles and the one for boys had little skulls and lightening bolts). I'll have to find a way to show pics. Of course, they were a huge hit but then Kristi made an excellent point: "Melissa, the $5 game cards for the kids are like a favor; you shouldn't have worried about doing more than that!" Huh... she was right. Oh Well! I also had blue hair spray and Mina picked up some blue crystal stick-ons that all the girls wore on their faces. Jeff's hair was blue but he as too shy to show it, so he sported a hat! Anyway, you would have thought that the party would go smoothly, etc. But it was crazy. Austin didn't take a nap AT ALL! that day. I was freaking out about it and Jeff was freaking b/c there was no time for him to get ready. Also, Jack was tired. So we got to the party, everything/everyone was waiting around and unsure. Then when we finally got started bowling, kids were hungry and Austin was completely in borderline MELTDOWN mode. Jeff's BOSS was there with his kids and we were so stressed about Austin having a bad kicking/screaming temper tantrum in front of him that we did any and everything we could think of to keep him happy. This meant he chomped down almost 3 bags of Cheetos from the vending machine. When we got in the party room we had to wait for the pizza and my dad had the kids chanting,"We want pizza!" and he cleverly added, "We want Tacos!" ;-) It seemed like forever but we eventually had the pizza done, we sang Happy Birthday (Austin sang the loudest) and he loved the look of the shark cake (decorated with 3 bowling pin candles and a bowling ball). They all had cake and ice cream and we packed the gifts up to take home. THEN CAME THE ARCADE TIME!!! It took ages for them to use all the $5 cards and I got to hold HEAVY Jack the entire time. Austin almost fell asleep in the truck on the way home but he managed through a third wind and when we got home he opened presents and we all played, the 4 of us, with toys while we watched The Sandlot (which I must add taught my son how to kiss like a man, pitch a baseball and say the word shit!).
On his actual birthday we met up at Grapevine Mills for dinner at the Rainforest Cafe. I thought he'd get a kick out of it and he did. Jack liked it too. They sang him Happy Birthday and he thought he was pretty cool shit. Then we walked the ENTIRE mall looking for baseball stuff! We gave up but on the way home I managed to convince Jeff to stop at Toys R Us on the way home and take him in (Austin had $5 from Memaw and a $3 gift card saved in his wallet for the occasion and I wanted him to get to use it). I'll never forget how adorable he and Jeff looked when they walked out of the store; he had a glove on his hand and he was so excited telling me about all the baseball stuff he got and how he was "going to hit the ball real far!" Poor Jack was so tired he cried, more like yelled, during the drive home. He was probably has relieved as I was when we got home and I realized that BOTH birthdays were officially done and behind us.
The idea is that next year, and probably most non-milestone birthdays, we will just do one kick-ass combo birthday party for the boys. It will be cheaper, that's for sure! And I'll only have to be crazy over one party instead of 4! (Of course, we'll still celebrate each birthday, just us Massies).
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Time is Mean
I can't believe how long it has been since my last post. No, I can believe how long it's been, I just have a hard time racking my brain to realize how many wonderful, challenging things life has thrown at me being the mother of 2 boys.
Time just goes by too fast. I would rather it drag than move at the ridiculous rate that it does. Jack is now 13 months old. That's right. I was away from blogging for so long that one of the most important milestones in his life has come and gone and all I have to show for it is this stupid paragraph. More if I wanted. It's just that I feel like there is SOOO much to comment on that the task itself gets overwhelming and I just don't do it. In short, I asked Mamasource for ideas on where to have the party and I settled on Splash at Bedford Boys Ranch. We had about 30 people show up. It was H-O-T and I felt bad for all the no-swimming adults who had to sit in the sun (even though I had rented the pavilion, the sun was hitting us from the east). Well, here's something good to comment on re: his party... I spent the entire day before his party and the morning of his party putting together party favor bags for the kiddos and making something like 50-60 sandwhiches. I made PB&J, ham and swiss and turkey and chedder sandwhiches, all individually wrapped with a napkin and labeled!
So now Jack is awake from his nap (Austin's been watching the Sandlot 2 in the living room solo) and Jack's probably about to fall off the bed (again) which means my time ('ole meany that he is) is forcing me to end my post. More on Jack's party and Austin's 3rd b-day celebrations later.
Time just goes by too fast. I would rather it drag than move at the ridiculous rate that it does. Jack is now 13 months old. That's right. I was away from blogging for so long that one of the most important milestones in his life has come and gone and all I have to show for it is this stupid paragraph. More if I wanted. It's just that I feel like there is SOOO much to comment on that the task itself gets overwhelming and I just don't do it. In short, I asked Mamasource for ideas on where to have the party and I settled on Splash at Bedford Boys Ranch. We had about 30 people show up. It was H-O-T and I felt bad for all the no-swimming adults who had to sit in the sun (even though I had rented the pavilion, the sun was hitting us from the east). Well, here's something good to comment on re: his party... I spent the entire day before his party and the morning of his party putting together party favor bags for the kiddos and making something like 50-60 sandwhiches. I made PB&J, ham and swiss and turkey and chedder sandwhiches, all individually wrapped with a napkin and labeled!
So now Jack is awake from his nap (Austin's been watching the Sandlot 2 in the living room solo) and Jack's probably about to fall off the bed (again) which means my time ('ole meany that he is) is forcing me to end my post. More on Jack's party and Austin's 3rd b-day celebrations later.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
