Motherhood Again

I'm back to posting and this is going to be a short one. I just want to say that after 2 healthy pregnancies and 2 miscarriages, I am so ready to have this pregnancy move into the "safe" zone. Every uncomfortable feeling goes to the place in the back of my head where anxiety and memory live. It will be so nice to be in an emotional place where I can stop worrying and just be happy, but I guess that really can't happen until baby is out and I see her healthy being. Then the pregnancy will be over :-(

So, since this is my last pregnancy, I am going to really try and not worry, but instead spend my moments savoring and enjoying everything I can about this baby growing inside me. I'm about 95% sure I started feeling her move. I was at 14 weeks which is way early for that. But I've been here before and it seemed pretty much like baby is what I was feeling. I've felt her more and more as I've gone into my 15th week. I can't wait for weeks 16, 17 and 18! The more I feel her, the more I will know how real she is.

"She." That's right. The blood work showed baby M is a girl. I have always, always wanted to have a daughter. I really, really wanted a girl and now I am going to have one. At least, I hope so! I have a strong belief that a mother-daughter relationship can be one of the most special gifts in the world, if handled correctly, and my dream since childhood was that I would get to be a part of that someday. Now it looks like I will. I can't wait to see Jeff holding his little baby girl! This one is going to make him cry in the hospital room, no doubt about it.